Relationship is somewhat akin to reading. When you find no coherence with the person (book), you have to let go, regardless of your first impression (which turns out to be false).

Perhaps,the difference between communication and writing lies with the fact that the former requires more than one party. Sadly, people of our time no longer communicate with each other. Rather, they just talk and deliver their own thoughts unilaterally (without caring if others do listen). (you may probably accuse me of adopting the same approah in certain groups on occassions) However,the funniest thing is the tyrants (including myself maybe)never doubt and they always feel obliged to deliver another speech (even with no eloquence).

Both you and i are idealistic persons(allow me to be a bit legalistic). Perhaps, with our legal training, not only do we focus on equal rights (in particular, freedom to speech), we also strive to excel (and we will doubt the plausible theories).

Perhaps, that's why we can't rest with the position as a passive listener. And we incline to use the reasonable man standard to appraise others. (however, i guess it's better to jot a footnote to this (which you may call menacism thereafter): the results of such reasonableness test may not be reliable and sometimes can be far from satisfactory ... when the values of the society have been twisted and deviate from the absolute value(e.g. when people get used to the tyrants))

Having said that, i am afraid sometimes we do place too much expectations (and exert pressure) on others hoping others can be at least considerate (having at least a reasonable (or minimal) level of EQ) and consistent). Apparently, people of our time are no longer used to living up to others' expectations. Perhaps, the remaining question is not whether your ideologies may not be accomplished; rather, it's simply whether you are prepared to take the easy way and live with the distorted values of our time.

Dennis the Menace